Will

And then I opened my eyes

that had been closed for such a long time

and I took a deep breath

inhaling the whole world

and everything that exists in it

and suddenly my will

didn't want anything anymore.

Because I Can

I will kill you. 

You didn't do anything wrong, I know that. 

But I will kill you, because I can. 

I'm not sure yet, how it'll happen. Maybe a car accident. Maybe a robbery. Maybe suicide? No, that wouldn't make sense. 

Anyway, I'll let the others suffer. All the other characters that have been your companions along this novel. 

They'll attend your funeral and it'll be a dark scene. 

Maybe there will be rain. 

It always rains, when sad things happen in books. 

I'm sorry, but there is no happy end for you.

I am the author and the things is: 

I can do whatever I want. 

Never forget:

I created everything!

Throwing Stones

You run around searching 

for people who throw stones in your way. 

Once they do,

you shout: It's his fault! 

I could have succeeded, 

but he wouldn't let me! 

Pathetic little loser you are.

Warning

Reading your name still hurts me

hearing someone pronounce it

is like a slap in my face,

like the one you gave me. 

Since I've known you

suddenly
your name appears

everywhere

suddenly 

everyone 

has your name.

It's like a hidden warning.

I feel like this is specially for me

to never ever forget

my mistake.

I won't.

Julio

It’s a very cold day in July and his name is Julio. He’s got beautiful greenish- blue eyes and a shy smile. A smile that tells you he is a lost soul in a weird world. What has happened to him? Unjustice? Was this live he was living his fault? Was he living on the street due to mistakes he had committed? Was he a fugitive? A criminal? A murderer? 

I saw a young man walking down the street pulling a shopping cart full of papers and cans. Homeless people collect these things to sell it to recycling factories. Or they sleep on the pieces of cardboard, which gets wet over night and starts to crumble away like the lives of those who are trying to sleep on them.  

Julio was early strolling down the street. Today was the recycling stuff day. In front of every building piles of material lay waiting to be collected from the dustmen. I saw Julio emptying a trash bin, he collected everything he needed, newspapers, cans, plastic bottles. Half of the stuff fell on the floor. I was walking my dog and saw how Julio stopped and cleaned the sidewalk. He put the trash back into the bin and walked away. 

He kept on walking, crossed the street. Under a small tree five cardboard boxes full of things were waiting for Julio. He slowly walked towards it. Suddenly: the noise of the dustcard. Three orange-dressed young men running down the street, shouting orders to each other. Julio bending down to get the cardboard. Three men running around him getting the cardboard boxes and throwing them into the duscart. Julio stops. The dustcart drives away. Julio just stands there empty-handed. He’s not even worth the trash others throw away. He stands there for a while, then he turns around and walks away.

Julio enters my street. I meet him next to a little grocery shop. Hi! He doesn’t react. Oi! Have you eaten already? He looks up. Sad greenish-blue eyes and a smile that could have been a happy smile a while ago, now it’s a rare, wistful one. He shakes his head. Ok, then. Wait for me. Would you care for sandwiches? In a low voice: Yes. Wistful smile looking down. I enter the shop and order. What’s your name? My name? As if for a long time nobody had asked him for his name. Julio. Alright Julio, what do you want to drink?     Hesitantly: whatever you want to give me. Well, there are soft drinks, milk, yogurt, water...When he hears “yogurt” his eyes lighten. Yogurt is great! I buy two big sandwiches and one liter of yogurt, cross the street and hand it to him. He holds the food with his dirty hands (they are pretty small! How old might he be?). Thank you! Holding the food like a precious treasure, Julio on this cold day in July walks away with a wistful smile on his face. 

Überphilosoph

Once in a million years
someone is born
who makes a difference.

Doomed

And then hope was released

and humans were doomed

to everlasting hope 

for something better. 

Britney, or: The day I met John

I

I enter the classroom in the beginning of the new semester. New students looking at me. Kind of tense, eleven strangers inside a classroom, trying to figure out who's cool and who's not. As always there are some older men, lawyers or business man, fever women. I greet everyone, introduce myself and start calling the roll. Patricia. Hi. Nelson. Good evening. So I go on. In the end there is only one name left: John. There is only one person left in the classroom: a woman wearing a short skirt and black boots. Long blonde hair, pink lipstick. 

I read: John? I look around. She stands up: Yes. That's me. 

Silence. 

I am puzzled.  

I look at John and his long blonde hair, short skirt and black boots. 

I don't know what to say. Neither do the others. 

John smiles. 

Well...hi everyone. My name is John, but I'd prefer if you called me Britney, if you don't mind.

The older lady in the backround looks over her glasses: 

Call you what? 

Britney. 

Why the hell Britney? 

Because of my hair. 

Ah, I see. 

John smiles and sits down again. 

Silence.

Alright, welcome everybody! Let's start class. Have you all got your books?

EN VIE, or: The day the battle started

Portia had worked so hard for everything. Studied nonstop to get her degree. She went to gym, to keep her tommy flat and spent hours straightening her hair and waxing her legs. She was determined to succeed, as nobody else in her family had succeeded in anything. Her family was a disaster and she had suffered a lot trying to escape from the mess. Smart and pretty she was engaged to an upper class guy, who was calm and so predictable. With him, nothing could ever go wrong. She knew exactly what he would do next. Everything was fine. Almost.

Portia saw her friend Cailyn and got upset. Her friend was short and not very smart. Not as pretty as she was. Not hardworking and hot. And Cailyn got money and a husband who was fun and smart and gave her expensive jewelry and bought her a huge house. Cailyn's husband loved reading and travelling around and their live just seemed so unbearable perfect! Cailyn's family was impeccable and she never had seen any trouble in live.  Portia liked Cailyn, but her friend had done nothing to deserve this! She got everything and had not done anything to get it! 

Portia suddenly hated her friend. Deep anger and envy consumed her. She could not stop to compare their lives. Portia thought she was so much better and life had given her less than she deserved. She could not bear this unrighteousness!  

And then her tongue became poisonous and her heart became stone. Her smile froze cynically and a dangerous sparkle arose in the corner of her dark brown eyes. 

The battle had begun. 

Cailyn had no idea.  

Spaceless

Some people's ego

is so large

in their bodies

is no space left

for a soul.